this is the peak of adulthood and eating whatever you want
Month / April 2018
shakespeare was ahead of his time
reblog if baby don’t hurt me just played in your head in perfect tonality
cant wait to all the nsfw fanart of venom just goddang tongueblastin the life outta marvel characters
ignore this all you want but i know you’ve all internally acknowledged this
*googles number i dont recognize calling me instead of answering*
Well, yeah, because it’s pretty well guaranteed to be junk, and the only reason I’m looking it up is in case it’s a scam or something so that I know to block it.
honestly? im done with the lies. being little spoon fuckign sucks okay? it really does. its hot and sweaty and cramped and you better believe that arm wrapped around you is gunna go from “acceptable foreign weight” to “there is a literal blue whale colony collapsed atop you” in about 2 minutes flat. yall forreal want a FLESH BLANKET encasing you??? a goddamn slab prison of human skin and Person Tissue draped across your corporeal form??? find a God and grovel for redemption.
being big spoon though? divine. precious. it grants the sensation of being a benevolent egg white, swaddled loosely within your blanket shell as you in turn cradle the precious yolk within your grasp. you are a sublime deity of warmth and comfort, one who may bestow your blessing on any mortal you deem fit. an unparalleled joy to perform.
and you can grab a tit ty
can yall please stop reblogging this post i made after eating three entire packages of marshmallow peeps washed down with a near-deadly amount of nyquil
Just say you’re a top and move on OP
Dya wanna know something pretty cool? I’ve survived 100% of my worst days. And if you’re reading this? So have you. And that’s awesome.
I really fucking needed to hear this today.
I lost a follower last time, let’s do this again!! If you disagree with any of these get off my blog please and thank you!
Weather these days:
Mon: 75° ☀️
Tues: 22° ❄️
Wed: 57° 🌤
Thurs: 30° ☔️
Fri: 80° ☀️ (with a chance of snow)
🐝 save the bees
🌳 save the trees
🌊 save the seas
a paper mache bucket ... tumblr mirror 